Zagorin Apples Image: Priya Q

Continuing from my last post – As we drove into the hills, we were welcomed by arrays of apple trees spread over vast orchards on either side of the road intermittently interrupted by huge chestnut trees. If you haven’t had chestnuts so far, then you must! Both roasted and boiled chestnuts are delectable. Talking about apples, the apple produce from Zagora is distributed all over the world and is a unique much wanted brand. They are called Zagorin. I was quite lucky to be in Zagora during the picking season which was in September.

Image: Mr. Q

After the long and beautiful drive up the Mount Pelion all of us longed for a bite and some rest before we headed out in the evening. Besides it had started to rain. The spacious balcony of my friend’s vacation home overlooked an extensive garden with apple trees, grapes, strawberry, and kiwis besides flowers including few wild ones. I was told that most of the houses here had their own fruit gardens. My friend quickly tossed together a delicious Greek Salad called Dakos which we relished with Cypuro (a local drink stronger than Ouzo). However, I must admit that Cypuro was way too strong for me hence I had to limit my enjoyment to Dakos.

Greek Salad - Dakos Image: Priya Q

Cypuro Image : Priya Q

Unlike India, people all over Europe prefer having their dinners by early evening and then head out for partying. So that’s what we also did. However, we decided to visit the village of Pouri for a lavish Greek dinner at a small restaurant called Makis. We ordered grilled chops, stuffed pork intestine, pie with greens and spetzofai – which is basically sausages combined with green peppers.

When you visit any of these restaurants you will find that most of them are decades old and mostly one man show with the owner running around from table to table chit chatting and even suggesting the specialties. However, please ensure that you are aware of the prices else you might just be taken for a fishy ride like we did when we visited another restaurant named Niki in Zagora for lunch the next day. A single fish meal costed us €30! However, don’t let that deter you from going to Nikis, as the pitas and sea weed salad are delectable and a must try here.

Being a romantic destination, my friend had decided that Zagora is where she would take her wedding vows and Saint George church is where she will walk the aisle. So it was but obvious that I wanted to visit the Saint George church and visualize the future wedding with her. There are two other churches that you can visit in Zagora called Agia Paraskevi and Agia Kiriaki. Agios Gergiou or the St.George church dates back to the 17th century and looks quite plain from look of it; however the interiors are equally grand with its golden throne and pulpit, designed with intricate motifs inspired by nature.

Boxes with honey bees for collection of honey Image: Mr. Q

Besides, the churches other places to visit are the Greek museum (Rigas) which is one of the oldest schools and famous for famous Greeks who passed out from here. Zagora also houses very old library with a collection of approximately 18,000 books including many rare editions.

It’s simply amazing, how a small village as Zagora can be so self sufficient. They have the mountains, they have the sea, they have churches, bakery, restaurants, pubs…Oh yes! They have pubs and bars as well! I visited one of them called Anamela, where the owner knew all the guests on a first name basis! Do check to find out which days the pubs are open before making your plans; apparently they are opened on public demand and don’t have specific days of week when you expect them to open!

You would have possibly got bored with my statement “The best way to explore a place is by walking” in almost all my travelogues! But, that’s a fact. Winding roads and cobbled by lanes constitutes the roadways and walkways of Zagora. You will notice houses with typical slanting stone roofs. These are traditional houses and are called Arhontika. The flora of this region mainly constitutes of Hydrangea and Gardenia. The greenery, the silence and the warmth of the smiling people around is worth the walk. And I also noticed a board with something written in Greek, one word somehow looked like my name! check it out!

Image: Mr.Q

There are about 24 villages dwelling on the Mount Pelion; Tsagarada is yet another village which has many cafes and interesting restaurants besides spring water fountains that you can visit. Here, at the square of Agia Paraskevi you will find a thousand year old tree, one branch of which is supported by a concrete pillar specially erected for this purpose!

Image: Priya Q

Image: Priya Q

A sparkling blue sea with a flawless white pebbled beach is yet another bonus to your travel kitty. Who could think of having the best of both worlds – hills & sea in one trip! Saint 40 is one of the beaches, a 10 minutes drive from Zagora. It is located at a seaside village called Agioi Saranta. With traces of rain and sun playing hide and seek, the dip in the sea was quite thrilling. As you walk across the beach, other things you might notice are professional anglers, a bar called Mamba – which according to the locals is very popular and quite rocking. You will also notice a statue of a woman with a child that was built in remembrance of a lady and her child who drowned in that very sea! Sad indeed!

Image: Priya Q

The nearest city from where you can drive to Zagora is city of Volos in Thessaly, Greece. Zagora is about 47 kms away from the city of Volos. It is a lively town and from the port of Volos there are daily schedules to the islands of the Sporades: Skiathos, Skopelos and Alonissos. You can reach Volos also by air and railways.

If you are looking for that perfect vacation where you commune with the nature and be in your restful mind, then Zagora is a place to visit.

enjoying a coffee break with our Greek friends..Image : Priya Q

Ionnina, Greece Image: Priya Q

My trip to Greece last year was full of cheery surprises. All I had in mind was to visit my friend in Thessaloniki, the second largest city in Greece and a trip to Athens to dine with the Gods; I didn’t know my fate had many lucky bonuses on cards.

I was in Slovenia and was planning to go to Thessaloniki. Armed with the Eurail pass, I had booked myself couchettes from Ljubljana to Thessaloniki via Belgrade & Sofia. Little did I realize that since Hungary and Bulgaria weren’t a part of European Union (EU), a separate visa was required to enter these countries in the east of Europe; something which I totally overlooked during the trip planning! A week before the journey when I realized the mistake, I was facing a challenge on hand. To reach Thessaloniki via land was just not possible. (Flying in was even more expensive!!) So I changed my itinerary and decided to get to Greece via Italy. That was faster than applying for a visa from Serbia!! So Italy which was not in my original travel plan, a country I plan to visit and explore in my next trip to Europe, came on to my itinerary.

Adriatic Sea, Bari - Italy Image: Priya Q

With a brief stay in Venice and Naples, I reached Bari at the tip of Italy, to get on a ship across the Adriatic Sea to Greece. There are many options available for one to use the Euro rail passes for journeys in Ships too. Bari being a prominent sea port I found loads of tourist groups walking around the city. However, most of these tourists are on a short 3 to 4 hours stay while their cruise liners take in a stop.

An overnight ship ride from Bari, Italy to Igoumenitsa in west of Greece costs €17 per person and is a lovely experience. If you are looking at a separate cabin / room for yourself the charges are much higher. There is a full fledged restaurant, coffee shop, bar and casino on board to keep you entertained at an additional cost. There are two stops made by the ship. So if Athens is your destination, Patras further south of Greece is where you need to get down. My stop was Igoumenitsa.

In my wildest of dreams I did not imagine what was in store when I landed at the port of Igoumenitsa, a city which only has the port to boast about. My friend had driven down from Thessolinki to pick me up & thus my road trip to Thessaloniki from Igoumenitsa was packaged with many stops in between at various historical and quaint villages of Greece including Ionnina, Meteora, Metsovo,… etc. all of which I would highly recommend to anyone planning to explore Greece – as a must visit. I have already shared with you my experience at the quixotic Meteora.

There are so many of these small but historic & beautiful places in Greece that one must read up on all the places one is going to visit or take local assistance in planning your trip in Greece so as to make the most of it.

View from Mount Pelion Image: Priya Q

If you were to ask me where you should or rather must go. Then I would say don’t miss Zagora. Zagora, a dream land village on Mount Pelion is a place you can describe as an idyllic getaway from not only the warps and stress of life but you yourself! This enchanting locale totally soaks you up in its tranquility and takes you to a state of magical thoughts.

My friends vacation house in Zagora, Greece Image: Priya Q

Possibly the best combination of sea and mountains Mount Pelion has many villages offering different adventures. And the best part is that you can stay in one village and still enjoy what other villages have to offer within few minutes drive! I happened to stay in the largest village and probably the most beautiful – Zagora, thanks to my friend who invited me over for a stay at her dream vacation house in Zagora. My stay here gave me some idea about how Alice would have felt in the wonderland! With each room adorned with frills and superfluities this house was a picture straight out from a fairy tale.

Mount Pelion Image: Priya Q

Zagora on Mount Pelion is about 4 to 5 hours drive from Thessaloniki. Right from the time you first get to see it approaching from a distance and then through its winding mountainous roads you get glimpses of what lays ahead, as you drive on wide roads via the city of Volos.

Fresh and clean breeze welcomes you as you ascend Mount Pelion. The panoramic view of the city from the mountains is breathtaking. But more mesmerizing is the beauty all around you.

What to see and do while at Zagora follows in my next post

Dragon Bridge - Ljubljana

The largest city in Slovenia, Ljubljana is about 2 hours of drive from Koper (if I count the repair time it took to get our car on road then our trip was of 5 hours! ). The Ljubljana Dragon is the symbol of the city and is prominently depicted in the coat of arms on the country flag also. There is a bridge called the Dragon Bridge crossing Ljubljanica River right in the heart of the city. The whole of this area can be explored on foot.

Artists performing on the Cobbler's bridge Image : Priya Q

A little ahead from the Dragon Bridge as you walk you come across the Cobbler’s bridge also called the Shoemakers’ bridge designed by the architect Plecnik. It received its name after many shoemakers set up their stalls on this bridge to sell products. However, now you can find musicians and street artists performing on this bridge.

Dr. France Presersen

Another bridge which is a landmark in Ljubljana is the Triple Bridge which connects the main square and a newer part of town with the Old Town and the Market. It is the best place to take a break and experience the surroundings. As you cross this bridge you find yourself in Preseren square, the main square in Ljubljana. Preseren square or Presernov Trg is dedicated to the greatest Slovenian poet Dr. France Preseren. A statue of the poet has been ensconced at this square and serves as an ideal landmark for meeting friends. Just across this statue is a street that opens from the square where you can see a head of a women stuccoed on a building. Apparently, this woman is none other than lover of the poet Preseren named Julija looking at the statue of her admirer! (Legend has it that she used to stay there and the poet used to write & recite poems for her from the ground floor!!)

Julija Image: Priya Q

Burek

It is in the market close to Preseren square that I had my first Burek, which constitutes to the fast food culture of the country. Extremely rich, Burek is a layered pie with cheese, meat or apples. It is difficult to finish off one portion in one sitting, at least that is what I can say about myself! Nevertheless, it is delectable and a must try when in Slovenia. Having been under the influence of German, Austrian and Hungarian powers in the past the Slovenian cuisine is a mix of all these cultures.

St. Nicholas Cathedral Image: Priya Q

Other attractions to this city are the St. Nicholas Cathedral located at the Vodnik Square walking distance from the Triple Bridge and the Ljubljana Castle dating from the 16th century. I also sneaked a peek at the Ljubljana University, which was quite impressive. I found a lot of people smoking in groups outside and was informed by my friend who was taking me around the city that it was no more allowed to smoke in enclosed areas, hence the groups outside. This is quite opposite to the smoking rule we have here in India where smoking is prohibited in public areas while you are free to do so in the confines of your room!

Having had a walk around the centre of the city, I headed back home for a short break. Later in the evening along with few others I headed out to Metelkova, a place frequented mostly by students. Not a very posh set up, this place acts as a pub cum recreational hub for the local youth. You have various activities like acts / bands etc running in parallel. It also had a hostel which used to be prison once upon a time! The hostel however was done up nicely and had a nice café on the ground floor. This place is where the youth of Ljubljana hangs out. The music is loud & there are several places which you can hang out, depending on your choice – trance, rave, techno, house…etc. I met a DJ performing at the open stage there and was thrilled to hear strains of Bollywood music. It so happens that he visits India for 3 months every year & he is as clued to the Indian music scene as I was!!

At the violong making factory Image: Mr. Q

The Indian Evening @ Vrhinika Image: Mr.Q

I was staying with a friend in Vrhnika, 20 minutes drive from the capital city Ljubljana. One of the days I also managed to get invited by my friend’s friend to her Violin making factory, which was truly an enriching experience. The musical saga ended with an Indian evening my friend hosted where I exhibited my culinary skills along with teaching few Bollywood moves!

Lake Bled Image: Priya Q

The next day was reserved for a day excursion to the delightful Lake Bled which was another picture cut out from the fairy tales. A popular tourist destination Lake Bled is a glacial lake in the Julian Alps located in the North West of Slovenia. It is the most romantic sight that you can think of, may be that is why you have couples coming to get married at the Church on the Bled Island.

Couple on their way to getting married Image: Priya Q

I actually saw a bride sitting pretty in her white wedding gown and her groom suave in his black suit on a boat on their way to the church to take their wedding vows. You can make a trip to the island on a boat along with other tourists. Per person cost is €12 which I was told was a steal since normally it costs somewhere in the range of €20- €25. Was it my lucky day? May be! You are given approximately 30 minutes on the island after which you need to get back to your boat. Do not forget to ring the church bell which is said to make your wish come true! (Since mine had already come true, I did not!!)

The Bled Castle Image: Mr. Q

Characters dressed in traditional Slovenian attires (looked more like theatrical Roman attires!) welcome you into the medieval Bled Castle located on the top of the lake. Bled Castle is yet another place where couples loved to get married and I met two such couples amidst a grand set up. The entry cost is around €7 which in my book of accounts is a bit too much for there is nothing much the castle can boast of. There is a small museum detailing Slovenian history & highlights along with delightful costumes. Of course, the stunning bird’s eye view of the turquoise blue Bled Lake, is unforgettable and is definitely not to be missed.

View of the Lake Bled from the Bled Castle Image: Priya Q

The Bled lake is 35 kilometers from the Ljubljana International Airport and 55 km from the capital city Ljubljana. Bled offers its tourist a wide range of sport activities like skiing, horse riding, golf, fishing, hiking and trekking.

Having filled up my lungs with fresh air, my mind with tranquility the Bled Lake had to offer and my thoughts with everlasting memories I headed back home. Even today when I think of Slovenia – Bled Lake & the Castle comes foremost to my mind and of course Burek follows a close second!!

Beautiful Koper... Image: Priya Q

2-3 days was all that I had planned to spend in Slovenia, but I ended up staying for a full 5 days traveling and exploring various places across Slovenia, such is the charm of this country located in the Central Europe.

I was in London trying to find out the best and the cheapest possible way to get to Slovenia when I came across a bargain from Ryan Air. You won’t believe it that I spent only 4 Euros to reach Trieste in Italy which is around 15 kms from Koper, a beautiful coastal city in Slovenia. So when you are traveling in Europe; do check on the various offers and discounts made available by various airlines before booking your tickets. There are lots of buses and trains available from Trieste to go to other cities in Slovenia. Since I had a friend receiving me at Trieste bus station I didn’t have to look further into commuting details.

Image: Priya Q

Cool fresh breeze emanating from the deep blue ocean, fringed with palm trees, cafes and bars – Koper oozes out its tranquil juices to calm your senses. So laid back is the culture of this city that you fall in love with the place almost immediately. So if you are looking for that perfect vacation where you can put your feet up and do nothing, Koper is the place to be.

Having traveled to the other countries in Europe before landing in Slovenia, I also found it relatively cheaper. My favorite cappuccino costed 1.20 Euros almost everywhere in Slovenia, whereas it costs anything between 3.20 to 6 Euros in other parts of Europe! I loved my coffee in Slovenia not because it costed less but also it was the best. I also realized one thing that if you want your coffees hot you need to tell them while ordering or you will end up having a nearly cold coffee. Apparently that’s how the locals like it!

It was in Koper where we noticed for the first time that all the cars were running with both the headlights on in full daylights!! Initially, we thought some of these drivers had forgotten to switch them off. Later on in the day we realized that it’s a legal requirement to keep the lights on at all times of the day while driving a car!! (I saw some cars also do this in Greece.) So don’t ever switch off the headlights if you are driving in Slovenia

Orchestra performing...Image: Priya Q

While in Koper watch out for places where bands and local artists perform for to most such places anybody can enter. I was lucky to be around a huge open hall (overlooking the Sea) which I was told was once a fish market when a local orchestra landed to perform!

After an early dinner (around 6 pm!!) of baked potatoes with pumpkin sauce we set off from Koper for an evening outing. Just a half an hour drive from Koper to its west is located picturesque Piran. The first impression of this place is as if someone has cut out a picture from a fantasy story book of a small medieval town based on the shores of Adriatic Sea far away from the real world!

The Tartini Square... Image: Priya Q

Statue of composer and violist Giuseppe Tartini Image: Priya Q

The main attraction here is the square called the Tartini Square named after the famous composer and violist Giuseppe Tartini who played an important role in building the cultural heritage of the city. A large bronze statue of the artist is commissioned in the middle of the square. At the square I also witnessed a shoot whether for television or movie I could not tell. But the attires of the characters were as if reaffirming the town’s history of being a part of the Roman Empire around the year 952!

Image: Priya Q

Caffe del Morro Image: Priya Q

A stroll on the breezy walkway separating the Sea and the array of cafes and restaurants is heavenly. I decided to sit in one of the cafes and enjoy (no points for guessing) cappuccino and simply enjoy the view of the vast Sea while my friends opted for a local cola and beer. Unlike rest of the Europe where you are flooded with beer choice, Slovenia offers two options named Lasko (Green) and Union (Red) of which I was told Lasko is the better of the two. This little town of Piran has its own international airport and a marina as well!

Image: Priya Q

I have already told you about my trip to Divaca the site of the less commercial but the extraordinary Skocjanske James / Skocjan Caves in one of my earlier write-ups. If you are in Slovenia, a visit to this magnificent UNESCO Heritage site is a definite must.

Image: Priya Q

After spending two and half days of fun and rejuvenation at Koper, I decided to travel to Ljubljana, the capital city of Slovenia. Don’t ask me why it is pronounced as Lub-lee-ana while it’s spelt so different. After spending a month in France I had somehow got used to the silent letters and way-off pronunciations! I remember speaking in syllables in France for nobody understood my pronunciation! So Lub-lee-ana it is!

My travelogue on Ljubljana and the beautiful Lake Bled will follow

Well, don’t we all wish that we are at anytime aware of all offers ? Here I have Elizabeth sharing her insights on finding a flight deal while flying out from United States…

6 Ways to Find a Flight Deal
Heading down to the airport can be rather expensive in today’s world.  With excessive baggage, food fees, and everything else, the airlines want to charge you for everything.  So, how can you spot a deal, and save on your airline flight?  I’ve found that the tips that I’m about to tell you work best from those that fly out of the United States, but your results may vary.  Let’s take a look at 6 ways to cut down on your expenses.
Start by bringing a carry on: Never check in your bags anymore, unless you have to.  Many major airlines are charging $25, and more per bag just to have it checked in.  The sad thing is that it’s going to be going both ways.  For example, as of 2010, Delta is charging $25 one way for each bag, per passenger.  That’s $50 round trip!  Jam as much as you can into a carry on, and avoid these pesky charges.
Use comparison engines: Sites like Kayak are amazing when it comes to finding the best deal.  Simply input where you want to go, and when, and Kayak will provide you a calendar with the cheapest days possible for the month.  You’re going to find that by flying on a Tuesday, or Wednesday, you’re going to save the most money.
Be flexible: I already mentioned it, but Tuesday, and Wednesday are going to be your best days to fly.  What you’re going to want to do is keep your week opened.  You don’t want to fly on a weekend, because those days tend to be the most money, and you definitely don’t want to fly during the holidays.
Pick a smaller airport: If you live in a metropolitan area, you’re probably going to choose your major airport hub.  What you should do next time is try your local, smaller airport.  They will have fewer flights, but the prices are generally cheaper.  You’re going to deal with less people, and the flights won’t be as crowded.

Consider a package:  Like any vacation, you’re going to need a rental car, hotel, and more.  If you plan on getting these all at once, you may want to look at travel vacation packages.  You can save up to 75% by booking everything at once through travel agent based websites such as Priceline, and others.
Be a loyal passenger: If you fly a lot, you may want to join the airline’s frequent flyer program.  Most of the time they are free, but what you’re going to find out, is that the more you fly, the more miles you’re going to build up.  This is great for those that are looking to get free flights for every 25,000 miles+ flown.  To top it off, consider an airline miles credit card and you can save even more!
By being smart and comparing prices, you’re going to find that it’s not too hard to find a good deal.  If you don’t care what airline you fly, or what airport you fly out of, you truly can find a great deal.

This is a guest post written by Elizabeth Cutten.  Elizabeth writes, and manages FindAirlineCards, a travel blog that showcases travel tips, how to save money, and anything else travel related.

Well, good news for the lovey doveys this year is that Shiv Sena is busy doing more important stuff like vandalizing Shah Rukh Khan’s poster, trying to break in theatres etc so probably one can expect a peaceful Valentines Day this year. Or is there another repeat of pink chaddi or a hug karo pub bharo campaign round the corner?

Anyways, this post is for those who wait for 14th February every year to tell their girlfriends / boy friends / spouse how much they love and care. I was generally browsing through the net to catch on the Valentines Day buzz this year. Frankly the prospect of following any of these Valentines Day ideas and thinking of the reactions from my partner thereafter itself makes me laugh

For example Valentines Day Ideas on one of the sites says – Start the day by filling up the room with red roses. Wake up your partner by showering him/her with rose flower petals. Well, I refuse to do it since I care for him. Don’t want him to fall off the bed early in the morning! People really do this? I have seen it in movies of course…but real life…really?

The next idea that follows – Proceed by making breakfast for your beloved. In case you don’t live together, give your beloved a good morning call to wake him/her up.  In my case my partner likes to wake up by himself besides I prepare breakfast everyday! So should I make it different by not cooking that day?

I don’t want to even mention the other ideas that were mentioned thereafter. Frankly, it does make me wonder if marriage has made me too pragmatic! But I find it funny to see couples dressing up, planning romantic lunches and dinners and cutting out pink hearts on 14th February (only to pull out your dagger to pierce that very heart the very next day! ).

The contention here is why wait for one day every year when you can do things the Valentines Day sites suggest any / each day of the year. What stops you from planning a candle light dinner with a simple or elaborate meal at home any time during the year? You can or rather you should go on a long drive when ever you feel like! If you are a greeting cards person, pick them up as and when you feel like saying sweet nothings to your partner! Deliver flowers to make your partner’s day; you don’t have to wait for his/ her birthday to come by!

Anyways, I shouldn’t be spoil sport for the ones already making big plans for the Valentines Day. So especially for you guys here are 24 Valentine’s Day sms that you might like to use to flatter you partner every hour of this special day! Here’s wishing you all a happy Valentine’s Day!

SMS 1

Loving is not just looking at each other, it’s looking in the same direction. Happy Valentine’s Day.

SMS 2

For you see, each day I love you more
Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.

SMS 3

U r unique
U r caring and
U r the Best.And I am d luckiest to have U in my life!
Happy Valentine’s Day my sweet heart!

SMS 4

Love is missing someone whenever you’re apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you’re close in heart. As we are, Happy Valentines Day sweetheart.

SMS 5

Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but are always perfect for you. This is for you, my soul mate who is the love of my life.

SMS 6

Life is so short, so fast the lone hours fly,
We ought to be together, you and I.
Miss you every hour and every moment of everyday sweetheart

SMS 7

I finally got my past, present and future tenses correct today. I loved you. I love you. I will love you forever!

SMS 8

In School, They Taught Me That
1 hour = 60 Mints
1 Min = 60 Secs
But They Never Told Me That
1 Sec Without You = 100 Years:

SMS 9

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart. As my love for you..

SMS 10

If I reached for your hand , will u hold it ?
If I hold out my arms, will u hug me ?
If I go for your lips, will u kiss me ?
If I capture ur heart , will u love me ??

SMS 11

I never saw so sweet a face
As that I stood before.
My heart has left its dwelling place
And can return no more.
Be with me forever.

SMS 12

Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be.
Will you spend the rest of your life with me?

SMS 13

Don’t wait until it’s too late to tell someone how much you love, how much you care. Because when they’re gone, no matter how loud you shout and cry, they won’t hear you anymore.

SMS 14

Wen things go wrong…
Wen sadness fills ur heart…
wen tears flow in ur eyes…
always remember 3 things
1) I’m with u…
2) Still with u…
3) Will ALWAYS b…

SMS 15

I luv my eyes when u look into them; I luv my name when u say it; I luv my heart when u luv it; I luv my life when you are in it.

SMS 16

As days go by, my feelings get stronger,
To be in ur arms, I can’t wait any longer.
Look into my eyes & u’ll see that it’s true,
Day & Night my thought r of U..

SMS 17

I would cross a thousand oceans just to hold you tight. I would climb a thousand mountains just to be with you every single night. Darling I miss you so much.

SMS 18

I would never be tired of you even if I am with you all day long. In fact I grow to like you a little more every day. I love you.

SMS 19

I m on a mission:
Misson 2 avoid u,
2 forgetu, 2 get rid of u,
2 not 2 talk 2u or meet u,
in short….
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE!!

SMS 20

Ur precious love has
turned my life completely around,
I feel lik Im wlaking but
my feet dont seem 2 touch d ground..!!

SMS 21

Relationship doesn’t get closer by meetings, but it is sweetend by THOUGHTS. I care for you in my own STRANGE ways. Maybe you will never know,  Maybe I will never show..

SMS 22

To be honest with you, I don’t have the words to make you feel better, but I do have the arms to give you a hug, ears to listen to whatever you want to talk about, and I have a heart; a heart that’s aching to see you smile again.

SMS 23

The only regret I have is not knowing you since the day I was born – so that
I will be able to spend my ENTIRE life with you.

SMS 24

Sending you my bed to let you rest, pillows to give you comfort and my blanket to keep you warm. I can’t sleep now coz’ I’ve lent you all my things already. Gd nite! I love you.

Read about the history of Valentines Day. Apparently it wasn’t a greeting card company who invented it!

You have already read people’s views and comments on this subject in troubled relationship – part 1.

The post received quite a few interesting comments from the readers. My views are no different. But since I have the whole post space to myself I have the freedom to elaborate on my point of view citing few examples ofcourse!

In addition to what Avinash and Pradeep had to say, what I think is that in our youth we search for that right one who would understand our pulse than no one can. When that person comes our way we feel our search is over or that we might not find any one better (as the case may be!). In the initial excitement of what can be called love one forgets or rather ignores the not so happy aspects of their partners. We feel those things would go away somehow for that is the phase where you lay lot of importance to the word love and understanding which makes you full of hope. (so speak up when you have a chance…later your partner might not understand what the fuss is all about)

Few might argue that, that’s the way it should be – accentuate the positives forget the negatives. And that if you really love your spouse / partner you will accept all vices along with the positives etc etc and, guess what?.. I do agree! My argument would still be that if “some of the vices” are bothering your partner, and is being communicated to you more often than not; then you definitely need to look into it. When you start feeling your opinions and feelings are not valued, impression you get is may be your partner doesn’t care enough. (show you care)

Another option few take up is by completely ignoring such issues that might lead to disagreements and disharmony. They are hesitant to speak to their own partners about the challenges for they feel that their partner might get offended. But whom are we fooling here? I agree with Raj when he says that you should not take you spouse for granted. Give a patient hearing and resolve issues. If you have a better suggestion, give or else make peace with what is being suggested to you. (communicate, be a good listener and find a mutually satisfactory solution)

Trouble is part of your life, and if you don’t share it, you don’t give the person who loves you enough chance to love you enough.  – Dinah Shore

I feel that the potential problems between couples need to be openly communicated and not stifled. That is the only way things would work. The risk you run by stifling your emotion and feelings is moving slowly towards irreconcilable differences where you fail to see eye to eye. And that’s the end of it. And more than anything its respect towards your partner, than love that starts fading. (important to earn your partner’s respect year after year)

I used to be surprised looking at this couple (both of them head strong) who supposedly had a love marriage but hardly had any matter or subject where they had agreement on. And funnily (or unfortunately) they made disharmony the way of their life. Well, whatever works for them!

For me what is important is sharing, caring and open communication. Make your partner feel special and important enough for you to open your heart out. Don’t make you partner feel left alone. Those were the cheerful thoughts one generally has earlier on and it doesn’t have to change with times. (stop being indifferent)

Stop reading your partner’s mobile messages in their absence! Give enough breathing space to each other. I know of someone who doesn’t “allow” his wife to have her own circle of friends let alone friends of opposite gender and a guy who keep deleting messages from his friends of opposite sex for his wife is ever suspicious!! (trust your partner…have faith)

Many a couple find it more comfortable to talk to their friends about their marital challenges than their own partner and if infidelity follows you can’t feign surprise. Sadly that only happens when the partner is less receptive and just doesn’t want to change. Breaking a relationship is far easier than nurturing one. The question is if one is up for the challenge. Relationship is troubled only if either of the partners refuses to reach a mutually satisfactory solution and stick to ‘my way or the high way attitude’.  (again…communicate, be a good listener and find a mutually satisfactory solution)

“Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.” – William James

Marriage is a two way street. Today most of the partners don’t have patience to stick to any unacceptable behavior like in older times. You don’t have to look far. If we look at our parent’s generation we will find enough and more examples of sacrifices and forever forgiving attitude. I had a friend once commenting jovially about his parents that “if divorce was an option my parents would have been divorced 100 times!”

If you look at it subjectively even that wasn’t a very perfect arrangement either. Healthy relation is where you help grow each other, nurture, and care enough for each other.

Varsha made a valid point that – wouldn’t things be simpler if we were, ourselves be able to abide by all ’self help advice’? Well, me thinks that’s the only way to go! The day you let ego in between the two of you, life is doomed. You do things for each other not because you have to but you want to!

The reasons for a troubled relationship might vary but the solution is just one….own up to your mistakes, be open to learn, forgive and be open to change for a better future together – in other words commit yourself to the relation with full heart.

I completely with Anjana that “A healthy relationship, be it a marriage or any other, is based on the building blocks of love, respect and trust and even if any one of the 3 factors is missing ,the relationship will not be a balanced one.”

It’s just been 2.4 years since my husband and I got together, and life couldn’t have been more beautiful. Well, we do have our share of disagreements and arguments, but we are learning and working towards my dream which is – me silver haired and him probably with no hair and set of denture (hehe ) sitting in our dream home somewhere on the hills very much in love talking of our fun filled journey and enriched lives. Amen:) !

Shah Rukh Khan toh hain …hazaaron mein akela…

Circa 2020
Location: Mehboob Studios (it will still be around then, I guess!)
Film: “Wake up Sudhakar”

-A middle aged Ranbir Kapoor’s getting ready to play a 21 year old wayward youth, not knowing what it means to be a proper ‘Mumbaikar’…Ranbir Kapoor is in deep discussion with his director…which goes something like this…Ranbir Kapoor: “We can’t say this dialogue, has this been cleared by MNS? Can my character be called ‘Raj?’ Did we check with all the Thackerays??

Back to the present….which is tense…So despite the fact that there seems to be no perceptible threat to the Hindi film industry at large, its time that the Hindi film

fraternity stands up for their own…Especially when certain politically motivated individuals mix some comments to their own political agendas which could lead to a situation which could spiral into something akin to ‘dictatorship’… to a point where directors, writers and producers will have to line up to meet the ‘powers’ that be to get a ‘creative license’ which would permit them to make stories that would first meet the requirements of the ‘Sena(s)… So a scenario in the future, where film scripts will have to first go through the ‘Thackeray(s)’ of the city to meet their reel fate, is very much on the cards…

So yes SRK made a comment, yes he had an opinion, and yes we can react to it and yes…we may like or may not adhere to his views. And yes…others can say whatever they want to. But to resort to threats to damage property, to threaten that if someone holds a particular point of view then they deserve to be ‘dealt with’. Well its time for people to speak up…especially a fraternity which prides itself to call it an ‘industry’…if not now, then forever they will have to hold their
silence. A tightly gagged silence.

Of course it’s not yet calamity, its not as if they have destroyed theatres…well…they have not done it …’yet’. And perhaps it’s for this ‘yet’ that the industry needs to stand up for. Today ‘they’ will want you to be punished for ‘having favorable opinions towards a country’; tomorrow it could be anything…from growing a beard to wearing a mini skirt. So is Shah Rukh Khan being isolated for being what he is a ‘Khan’… a Muslim…or is he being isolated because the industry itself is scared enough of taking a stance against a body that prides itself on ‘goondaism’? Whatever it is…perhaps its time the Industry stopped changing Bombay to Mumbai to satisfy a few individuals…perhaps its time to know that sometimes its ok to say that ‘yes the film is about the 1993 riots’, if someone has a problem let them take the legal route…not the laathi route! Perhaps its time to tell a few individuals that Mumbai ‘kisike baap ki jagir nahi hain…it’s for every Indian and belongs to every Indian…who can have their own views and also have the basic democratic right to voice it, if they want to!

This is a guest post by Varsha Ranjit. Varsha a journo by profession,pseudo mallu, (as pseudo as they come!), a Puneri by birth, mumbaite through her six year stay in the bustling metropolis, and is currently discovering the ‘joys’ of marriage in the chaos thats become Bengaluru!

This is my 200th blog post!

What started as a casual affair back in 2006 is now the thing of present for me. It is only last year that I finally got to buying my own domain and now am totally addicted to it so much so that I started another blog of mine that talks about recipes and lots more. I admit that of late I haven’t been able to blog as much as I would love to, but nevertheless I will try!

This particular blog is to thank few people who have played a pivotal role in not only opening my eyes to the blogosphere but also supporting me in their own ways in the last one year of my Blogging.

First and foremost I thank Adheeth Ibrahim for opening my vision to blogging possibilities. Over a cup of coffee at Cocoa tree, a café in Kochi, it was Adheeth who prompted me to buy my own domain. Adheeth who is currently pursuing his MBA at Christ Church College, Bangalore is a budding entrepreneur and has one of his online ventures called Koch Vibes and pretty successful one too. Thanks Adheeth for bearing with all my silly and some not so silly (please give me some credit ) queries and never once getting bugged. Keep smiling that million smile.

What started as a suggestion tweet culminated to a great friendship with Anand Subramanian, a full time blogger and Internet marketer from Cochin (Kochi), Kerala the proud entrepreneur with his one of his online venture Cochin Square!. Thanks Anand for being a chat and a phone call away for all my “unique” challenges. Only you would know how unique and different I can get But for me how would you have ever enhanced your knowledge..hehe.. Jokes apart a big thanks to you for all the support and guiding me with all your tips and tricks over yummy doughnuts and cakes!

I would also like to thank my husband Q for all his encouragement and his non-sugar coated reviews. Q is a quizmaster by profession and also manages an events management company.  Q is a reservoir of information and ideas and I value all his advices and comments. Thanks Q for being there. Though I wish you could contribute articles more often, considering how my readers simply loved your write-ups!

I thank all my other guest contributors (in alphabetical order – Anagha, Anand, Girija, Lyndsey, Maria, Pradeep and Rajan)

Last but not the least; I will like to thank all my readers for encouraging me to come back with more, with your comments and feedbacks. Thank you so much. Off late I realized that am getting many readers from Russia, Bulgaria and Ukraine. Talk about world getting smaller! Am simply thrilled!

To all my readers - if you would like to read something specific around travel, food and living (relationships, social issues etc etc) write in to me at cogitoergosumpriya [AT] gmail [DOT] com. And I shall try my best write something for you.

I invite for my blog, guest contributions around the related topics of travel, food and living. Places to visit, place to eat in a particular city, kids, parenthood, relationships, write about anything of these and email it to me with a brief intro about yourself. Please ensure that your article is substantiated with related pictures with no copyright issues. I look forward to your contributions.

Thanks for everything!
Cheers to good times!

Tennis star Sania Mirza recently called off her engagement with her fiancée on incompatibility grounds. I was in two minds. Whether to mentally congratulate Sania on her stand early on in her relation or be skeptical for I know of many young couples with zilch resilience. Presuming the reason is not the latter one I would say good call!

I have wanted to write an article on this subject from a long time. Thanks to the falling apart of couples all around me!  Couples don’t seem to be blinking an eyelid before mentioning the dreaded D word. 7 year itch is no more than a misnomer; couples are parting ways as early as one year of their wedded life or as late as 20 years.

I decided to take opinions from both genders on this subject. Here goes….

Aninda Sen, Single, Employed (print media)

“I think that today’s high rate of divorce and incompatibility is a tell-tale sign of lack of time that couples spend with each other, do things together and more importantly grow together. Chasing a dream lifestyle means working out of different locations, time zones etc and its a recipe for growing apart. At a deep level, it’s about understanding LOVE and COMMITMENT. I think most people are not quite sure what it really means to share ones life with another. This may stem from the fact that folks don’t want to make any trade-offs with their lives – trading off something of value for something which has a higher perceived value.”

Suhasini Ravi, Single, Student (NY University)

“I think compromise is the key to any relationship. If even one person is ready to compromise for someone the other, that makes it very easy to keep a relationship going. Secondly, trying to complement one another rather trying to change one another is also very important. Space and freedom for each individual is required in a relationship.”

Avinash Krishnan, Married for 15 yrs to his college sweetheart, Self Employed (Web related)

“The main reasons for incompatibility these days: 1. Projecting what you are not during courtship leading to disillusionment later 2. Putting self before the relationship. In other words a strong reluctance to sacrifice ones way of life, desires etc for harmonious continuation of the relationship. Reluctance to ‘adjust’ with each other. 3. Finances – with both earning, concept of ‘my’ money and ‘your’ money rather than ‘ours’, can be the death knell.”

Girija Acharya , Single , Employed

“It is very much the responsibility of both the partners to help each other strike the right balance between their new relationship and the existing one’s in their life [by this ,I mean the family and friends of your spouse/partner]  and also respecting the individual space of your partner. Also, honest, open communication is a key ingredient for a healthy relation. In most cases the relationships that don’t work are the one’s in which either one of the partner [and may be his/her family] or sometimes both the partners have the complex that they are the best and that “we are always right” kind of an attitude. Basically, they are bad listeners.” Possessiveness, parental interference in marital affairs are other reasons of trouble. Having said that, even after putting in great efforts to make a relationship work, if it doesn’t work, it’s ok to part ways!! (If you keep a wound un-nursed for long, it becomes septic, causing its own demise)

Himani Aggarwal, Married for 5 years, currently on a sabbatical nursing 1 year old baby

“Relationships are troubled in general also and in specific terms also. It depends on how important the particular relationship is for you to fix and leave. More times than not, the many challenges of life that can impact a couple can be worked out if they are paid attention in an early stage. Else, issues just might grow and then hinder the relationship in totality. I personally believe that relationship can be sweet and open only where you can be what you are and not the way the other want you to be.”

Pradeep Chakraborty, Married for 15 great years, Tech Industry analyst and blogger

“You will run into trouble when selfishness creeps into any relationship. How many couples ask this question seriously before breaking up: why were you together in the first place? You need to accept your friend/partner with all of his/her positives and negatives. The day you don’t, you are asking for trouble!”

Varsha Ranjit, Married for 3 months, Employed (Media – News)

“Ego is something that we all are aware of, we talk about it, but when we ourselves are faced with it, we most likely let our egos do the talking/ reacting. Relationships generally tether delicately on what the power equations are be it between parents and their children, between siblings, between man and woman. In today’s day and age in most man-woman relationships, egos do a lot of talking and it’s so often we see long 5 year old relationships nose diving into nothingness because the ego takes over. Its the bitter truth, but here the concept of a compromise comes into being, you give some and you take some…so you give some space to your partner and then you get some space yourself, talking issues out is another way of dealing with issues…but having said all of this, wouldn’t things be simpler if we were, ourselves be able to abide by all ’self help advice’?”

VV Rajan, Married for about 7 wonderful years (only getting better), employed (advertising)

“I consider myself lucky to be married to the girl who is my wife now. Ours was an arranged marriage and given my own choice I couldn’t have had a better soul mate! I am saying this out of experience more than anything else. I don’t think I loved my wife then than how much I do now. I guess that’s what compatibility is all about!  While a relationship to me was all about taking things for granted, to my wife it was all about clarity, transparency and doing the right thing no matter what wrongs she was exposed to! I guess time was another factor that made me fully realize that life is not meant to be taken for granted and I am thankful that I don’t carry that attitude anymore! A relationship works better when you place priorities of your family first and then of the others. I guess most of us make this mistake of having a laid back attitude and taking things for granted especially when it comes to your spouse! And while in a relationship we also tend to procrastinate… There never comes a time tomorrow, it is always now!”

I leave you with these thoughts for today…my views on this subject will follow in the next post…

Best
Priya Q

p.s: Thank u so much guys for your views. Much appreciate!